livia is sitting at her husband johnny's grave.

My 15 Favorite Livia Soprano Quotes on The Sopranos

Livia Soprano was a force to be reckoned with, and her death after the second season was heartbreaking. Although she wasn’t technically there in person, her presence permeated the entire show, and for good reason. Here are the best Livia Soprano quotes on the show.

1. "You want that lamp? That lamp, that's real ormolu. You know what that's worth when it's new? Take it and take the Barcalounger. Somebody's gotta take this stuff before I die. Otherwise there's gonna be an lot of stuff here that the junkman's gonna have to cart off to the dump."

Livia Soprano is telling Tony to take her furniture before she dies.
S1, E2, "46 Long"

2. “You know, somebody called here last night after dark ... You think I’d answer, it was dark out!”

Livia Soprano is telling Tony that she doesn't answer the phone after dark.

3. "I wish the lord would take me now.”

4. "I phoned your house. Some operator answered. I couldn't understand a word she was saying."

Livia Soprano is smelling her mushrooms burning in her kitchen.

5. "I gave it all to your cousin Josephine."

Livia Soprano is telling her son, Tony Soprano, that she gave away all of her jewelry to her cousin Josephine.

6. "Water, water, water. It's like I'm living next to Gunga Din!"

Livia Soprano is complaining to Tony about the woman next door using so much water she's like Gunga Din.

7. "Depressed? My father came to this country with 17 cents in his pocket and never made a peep. What's he got to be depressed about? Nobody threw him into the glue factory, and sold his house out from underneath him!"

Livia Soprano asking how her son could be depressed because her father came to this country with 17 cents in his pocket and never made a peep.
S1, E12, "Isabella"

8. "I will never speak another word to you again, Settimia."

Livia Soprano is walking into the Soprano residence calling Meadow Settimia.
S1, E13, "I Dream of Jeannie Cusamano"

9. "You've got whooping cough! Get yourself under the vaporizer."

Livia Soprano yelling at A.J. and thinking it is her sister Cakey
S1, E13, "I Dream of Jeannie Cusamano"

10. "Shame? Oh, I've got plenty of shame. Believe me, you don't wanna hear what I'm ashamed of."

Livia Soprano meme
S2, E3, "Toodle-F*cking-Oo"

11. "You're still seeing your other women, Lorenzo?"

Livia is asking Larry Barese if he's still seeing his other women while they're at a wedding.
S1, E8, "The Legend of Tennessee Moltisanti"

12. "Stop it, Junior. You're making me very upset!"

Livia Soprano is in the car with Junior Soprano and she tells him to stop it because he's making her very upset.
S1, E1, "Pilot"

13. "Make plenty of noise. You never know who's in there."

Livia Soprano driving into her friend
S1, E2, "46 Long"

14. "She better not throw any artichokes at me."

Larry Barese telling Livia his mother hasn't been well in the mind.
S1, E9, "Boca"

15. "You know if I was that young lady, and you came and took me to that dance, and used that kinda talk, I'd slap your face!"

S1, E12,"Isabella"

Livia Soprano Quotes-Takeaways

In sum, there’s nothing, and nobody, like Livia Soprano. In spite of the size and ferocious nature of most of the wise guys, they were really no match for Livia’s wrath. Just ask Tony. Remember when he said his mother wore his father down to a little nub?

The truth is, Livia Soprano quotes add an additional level of brilliance, her rampant toxic narcissism notwithstanding. What are your favorite Livia Soprano quotes? Follow me on social media, subscribe to my newsletter (below), and be sure to check out my other blog posts, memes, and Sopranos quizzes!

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